From Paris With Love Review

Last night Bustin, Micah, Lojack, and I hit up Travolta's new smash-hit "From Paris With Love". The four of us composed a beautiful rainbow of diversity. Bustin earned friends by asking the ticket booth whether or not he could see the movie in 3d. 'Travolta in 3d' a nearby man said, 'that would be magic.'

Turns out no magic needed. The movie is a thriller from twenty minutes in to twenty eight minutes in. Travolta's first baller scene consists of him arguing with French customs agents about bringing energy drinks into the country. He spews a cock-slap of obscenities and politically insensitive diatribes, and walks out.

Travolta's character name is Charlie Wax. Besides being a fucking amazing name, it also allows him to tell a foe at gunpoint, "Tell your boss, 'Wax on, Wax off'". He beats and shoots the shit out of people, forces his partner to carry around a vase full of cocaine for no apparent reason - and even makes him snort coke for no reason - and shoots women in the head.

If the movie were 100% Johnnie Travolta, I'd give it a 6. Unfortunately it has some pretty boy british dude pretending to be a new yorker who wastes the audience's time from beginning to end. With Travolta on-screen: priceless. Without him: garbage.

All in all, if you're looking for a movie to laugh at, not with, this is definitely the one.

I give it a: 6