In Memory of Curtis

Today is a sad day for everyone.

I accidentally murdered my roommate Curtis while doing laundry. I was taking my clothes out of the washer and saw a furry little lump at the bottom, so I picked it up all innocent like "what's that shit?" When I realized, I dropped it and screamed like a little girl.

What the fuck Curtis. How did you get IN THERE?!

His fur was all smoothed out and clean and he looked like a flattened stuffed animal. But it wasn't a stuffed animal. It was a dead mouse.

Fuck. I was only trying to do my laundry.

THE GOVERNMENT FOUND ME

A woman showed up at my door claiming to be from the Census Bureau. She seemed alarmed that I was wearing my pajamas at 1 in the afternoon. Clearly we were on different wavelengths. She asked me for my address, which I thought was odd considering she had already found her way to my house. I think she was testing me, because when I told her I live in Barrytown she looked at her clipboard and replied, "no. no, you live in Red Hook." Don't tell me where I live, woman. I gave her the wrong zip code just to keep her on her toes. She also asked how many people live in the cabin. I mentioned The Famous Flying Ostrich, but I didn't tell her about the shrews. Do you think I should have?

On a side note, I've decided I'm going to turn in the two Ballatician$ albums for my senior project. Once they hear Long Time Cummin' they're sure to hand me my diploma on the spot.

P.S. Don't shit in my hummus, shrews. I need it for sustenance.

Taking a Poop

I've had a cough for months. I went to the doctor yesterday. He gave me meds. He's also a cop. He told me that, in California, sobriety checkpoints must give advance warning to drivers (for instance, a sign a block ahead) and allow drivers to legally avoid the checkpoints.

Food for thought

Bustin - Rollin'

Hey something actually worthwhile to blog, a new music video:

Check Out My E-Feelings

I counted nine deer in my backyard the other day.  I think they’re planning something.  A gathering in such numbers can only be suspicious.

New music projects have started crowding my briefly clean desktop.  This is both good and daunting.  I should probably start finishing some things.  

Oh, and good news for everyone: 

Following extensive political posturing and bureaucratic tomfoolery, I think I’ve finally added my senior project, under the conditions that I act more effusive, take advantage of the department’s vast resources, and imbue my art with an explicit social message.  At this point I should quote the great Sir Thomas Waits, who famously stated, “I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy,” but I won’t.  In cases such as this, it’s sometimes necessary to swallow one’s pride and take the frontal lobotomy.

In my day (today), we had to dig our cars out of the snow with our bare hands in order to leave our 18^th century log cabins and use the internet. With that in mind, I’d like everyone to take a moment to appreciate the ease with which we view lolcatz.

thump thump thump thump

family made a Wale remix.  it made it to #1 on hype machine.

DOWNLOAD IT

Wale - Good Girls (Andrew Clark + Quix Remix)

"Katamari Rollin"

New Video Coming Soon...